[1]   As a deer longs for flowing streams,   
          so my soul longs for you, O God.   
[2]   My soul thirsts for God,   
          for the living God.   
     When shall I come and behold   
          the face of God?   
[3]   My tears have been my food   
          day and night,   
     while people say to me continually,   
          "Where is your God?"

[4]   These things I remember,   
          as I pour out my soul:   
     how I went with the throng,   
          and led them in procession to the house of God,   
     with glad shouts and songs of thanksgiving,   
          a multitude keeping festival.   
[5]   Why are you cast down, O my soul,   
          and why are you disquieted within me?   
     Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,   
          my help [6]and my God.

     My soul is cast down within me;   
          therefore I remember you   
     from the land of Jordan and of Hermon,   
          from Mount Mizar.   
[7]   Deep calls to deep   
          at the thunder of your cataracts;   
     all your waves and your billows   
          have gone over me.   
[8]   By day the LORD commands his steadfast love,   
          and at night his song is with me,   
          a prayer to the God of my life.

[9]   I say to God, my rock,   
          "Why have you forgotten me?   
     Why must I walk about mournfully   
          because the enemy oppresses me?"   
[10]  As with a deadly wound in my body,   
          my adversaries taunt me,   
     while they say to me continually,   
          "Where is your God?"

[11]  Why are you cast down, O my soul,   
          and why are you disquieted within me?   
     Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,   
          my help and my God.

It has been a long time since I last posted a blog. After posting every day for the Year of the Bible, I took a break to finish my doctorate.  I am pleased to say that I completed that task. Now I want to get back to writing meditations on the scriptures.

I am choosing to write on a scripture found in the Daily Lectionary which is a selection of readings throughout the year. It includes several Psalms an Old Testament reading, a Gospel reading and another New Testament reading.

I will only focus on one reading each day. God keeps suggesting that I start with the Psalms so that is where I will start. My goal is to post every day but I will not promise it.

On to the scripture of the day: Psalm 42

Each of us who believe and trust in God and God’s provision goes through those times of doubt. This time of struggling with doubt may last hours, days, weeks, even months and years. The Christian mystic St. John of the Cross called this “The Dark Night of the Soul.”

It is comforting, in a way, to know that the psalmist also experienced times of doubt and despair. As we look at the way in which he handled this time we can learn about faith and how to approach God when we are struggling to believe.

We get weighed down by our troubles, by trying to be faithful in a world that thinks faith is for weaklings, a figment of our imagination. Sometimes we wonder if the skeptics are right. Maybe God doesn’t exist, or at the very least God seems to have turned away from us in our time of need.

One thing I am struck by is that even though the psalmist struggled with the thought that God had abandoned him and wondered about whether those questioning God’s existence were right he still maintained an open line of communication. He felt free to tell God about his doubts. He felt free to complain to God about his feelings of abandonment.

God’s shoulders are big enough to handle our criticism. When we are struggling we need to know that God wants us to share our struggles. God does not expect us to be the pillars of faith that other Christians or possibly even non-Christians expect us to be 24/7. Our relationship with God needs to be real and authentic. We need not feel ashamed when we doubt or question. We can be comforted in knowing that our God will listen even when we are not filled with joy, perhaps especially, when we are hurting.

The other person the psalmist speaks to is himself.  He reminds himself of the times when his faith was stronger. He reminds himself of the times when God’s presence was profoundly evident. He reminds himself of all the times when God was there, providing for him, giving him a song of praise.

The psalmist challenges himself to maintain hope in the midst of the doubt. He encourages himself that this time of struggle will pass. He will again be able to praise God.

When you are struggling, keep the conversation with God going. Even if you are struggling to believe, keep talking. Remember all the times when you knew God was present. Remember that even if you don’t feel that way now God is still there listening. Hope in god and you will again be able to praise.